I feel alone.
I am alone right now, but I feel alone, often times even when I am pyhsicaly with other people.
No self pity, I should be happy at how blessed I am and how easily things work out for me. As I think about it, I am rarely told no, and rarely cannot do what I set out to accomplish.
So why is it that I can't seem to make a decision, to figure things out? I have so many questions and I can't seem to find an answer to any of them. For example, I don't have anything more than a general goal of what I am supposed to do with myself once I graduate. This is only a question know because I need to decide where I want to focus. But I am afraid that I am so far in that if I change I'll be so far behind. I really really miss singing, and acting, and directing, and making movies with friends.
But am I doing anything about it? No. Am I inspired the way that I used to be? No. Can I even think straight? No.
I spoke to my old friend Dooley today, and he is trying to become a working actor. He's brave. I love acting. Maybe I would be thinking about how stupid I was for not going into film if I were in acting. I don't know.
Whatever, I need to go. Have a happy new year.
1 comment:
Knowing you... I'd say that no matter career you choose - you'll be successful at it. Also, you doubt yourself regardless of profession, skill level, or general accomplishments. It's pretty normal actually.
Although not plagueing me yet, I imagine the radio vs. TV issue is going to rear its ugly head into my life eventually.
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