Monday, October 20, 2008

Truths and Journal Entries

1. Two paper towels are ALWAYS enough to get your hands completely dry, but the trick is to take ONE, dry your hands, then throw it away, and take a second dry towel and dry again.

2. Mondays will always suck.

3. I'm about 2/5th through typing up all my journal entries. And it's been an interesting ride so far.

In regards to #3, I wish I could travel back in time and talk to my 14 year old self and say:

"Hey, calm down, everything is going to be alright. You spend so much time and energy fighting with yourself about your imperfections and mistakes, that you completely fail to notice the amazing things you are achieving. Spend that energy serving others instead of verbally and physically abusing yourself for every mistake."

Here's a tame example of what I'm talking about, from a May 1st, 2001 entry:

"In [Honors] English I found out that I got an 88 on my “Big Trouble” Literary Analysis. I could have found out on Friday, but I was having a bad day and I didn’t want to cry because of the bad grade I knew I got. "

Bad grade? That's a solid "B"! I want to go back and talk some sense into myself. I was constantly comparing myself the another student I was friends with, who was constantly getting better grades/perfect 100's on coursework. I ask myself now, "Who cares?" I went to film school, I'm going to be an editor, I don't need to be able to write the most perfect academic paper ever.

Mind you, during this time I was writing my script for my 30 minute community access TV show, I was helping out roto-tilling our garden and maintaining our home, doing a 2 hour radio show on a COLLEGE radio station, WRBC, Radio Bates College; attending church, boy scouts, and still having a social life with my friends. What did I expect of myself?

Anyway, I hope that I've learned that while striving for perfection is a worthwhile endeavor, beating yourself up for not achieving it is a ridiculous exercise.


Jonny Paula said...

That sounds like what I do sometimes!

Notjustanyone said...

With age comes wisdom....
You so smart already! and merely what? 22!!! You rock!
I remember you doing that all the time... I am less that perfect... so and so is better than me. Bosh. You were and are smart, fun, loving, and so much more....oh and you know on the high school dreamboat list..

Ezra said...

I'm very curious now as to the identity of this Notjustanyone character...

Jonny Paula said...